I'm against adoption. My life has been affected by it, and I've always wondered exactly who I am, even though my father was the one adopted. I never know how to fill out forms, and even though I loved my grandparents dearly...I always wondered who my real grandparents were. Are they alive? Is my grandma OK? Does she need someone to help her get up the stairs? Does she wonder about my dad? How would she react to me and my sister? Did my grandfather love her? Was she a victim? Was this her choice or was she a young mother pressured into this? These are the questions that have been in my mind since I was very young. These are the questions that had a 16 year old me ready to murder a social worker. These were the questions that caused me to tell my child's biological fathers mother she could take her opinion to hell WITH her. In a way I'm glad my father was adopted, it made adoption not an option for me. There was no way I was giving my daughter to strangers who might hurt her because some asshole with a stack of papers and a pen told me "this is the best option" No...no it's not. It's not just a child I'm giving up....but my life, my grandchildren, and my great grandchildren etc. I would have aborted her before giving her up to strangers. I think it would have been kinder. Never knowing who you are or where you came from is a HUGE distress. No one can ever love my daughter the way I do, and no one could "live my child as their own." That's impossible. It's impossible to tell me you're going to place her with a good family. YOU DON'T KNOW THAT!!!! That guy she's married to....Can you be certain he won't molest her at 13? After all...."she's not really HIS kid" That nice woman....Can you be so certain that she won't beat my child with a belt? No....no you can't. What I'm certain of....Even though I've struggled, yeah I had to put high school on the back burner, yeah she didn't ALWAYS have the latest greatest....but I kept a roof over her head, clothes on her back, shoes on her feet, and food in her mouth. Would it have been easier to give her up? Fuck no. Not kissing her goodnight, watching her grow, and constantly worrying about her would have made life much harder than keeping her. I've had 2 abortions. Both times I was on birth control....you know that good old 99.9% effective??? Yeah...apparently I'm 00.1% One of the pregnancies was due to failed birth control AND a broken condom. Where are those statistics? Obviously an already struggling 17 year old me couldn't care for multiple children. So I did what I thought in my mind was right. I aborted. Honestly I regret it. Some says I'm so riddled with guilt I can barely function. But at least I know where they are, and no one can ever hurt them again. I dream of them from time to time. But not once have I ever thought "I should have placed them for adoption." Before you go jumping my ass I'm not the only one against adoption. You'll be surprised to know there are THOUSANDS of birth mothers and adopted children HIGHLY against it. http://www.exiledmothers.com